My first on line book review

Necroscope by Brian Lumley
My rating: 5 of 5 stars

Ok well I had no idea what I was getting into when I picked this up at a second hand book shop and could not put it down and consequently have now read almost all of teh original series. The characters, plots and sub plots that live in the world that Lumley creates are just amazing and will suck the reader intio not being able to put the book down. The fact he can not only talk to the dead and help them, but also the fact that he builds a team around him that can try and stop the wamphyri threat. Harry Keogh is a one of a kind and is thrown into teh deap end of defending the world from the threat, do yourself a favour the series is an amazing visual stimulation for the brain and a fantastic read, fast paced and at times darkly funny the Necroscope will have you reading all night!

View all my reviews

For all my friends and readers I will now also be reviewing books and movies mainly horror on here for you to read.

Graeme

"Not My Soul" - The gripping new novel from Graeme Hawke

Matthew 10:28

And do not fear those who kill the body but cannot kill the soul. Rather fear him who can destroy both soul and body in hell.

 Chapter 1 - The Rebirth



The movement was swift and powerful, and as his left shoe was exploded from his foot on impact the rest of his body was a shattered mass of exploded meat and bone, thrown thirty feet from the point of impact by the fully laden truck. Even as his body crumpled in slow motion towards its final resting place his physical mind felt a nanosecond of excruciating pain followed by a dull peace and darkness. The next unit measure of time was immeasurable; it could have been an instant or millennia as far as Joe Griggs was concerned. The realization that he was dead took an instant as he could still feel his limbs and his physical being although he was on another plane of consciousness.

The atmosphere was nonexistent but in his mind it was think like treacle and soot mixed together and blown around, he started to cough and could see no reason why he would need to as his body was a shimmering play on light and dark, there were no angels no demons, yet, and he was stuck in place in a void that lacked any real description to his disembodied mind.

“Hello” I thought I said aloud, but it must be a hangover from my corporeal days as a human, the psychic feedback that left me bellowed for a second time. “Hello! Is there anyone there” I motioned again. Nothing still nothing, shit I must be dead! Is this death, am I transitioning to be reborn or some shit or is this where I stay until what’s left of me dissipates in this mire of dark smoke. I cannot move, nor turn, I just am! Another period of what must be time where I am passed and I have no idea how long it was as I don’t really have any perception of this non reality. I felt something happening, what was left of me was moving at light speed and in an instant I was transported to yet another place where there were more like me, I can’t see faces as such but I can interpret the outlines as shadows of their former selves as I was, and although I really don’t see, I can sense them. Silhouettes shifted and moved around me as if all in the space were looking at each other, Shapes in front were there, then gone in a blink as we surged forward in unison to God knows where.

“God, GOD! Has nothing to do with this place Azurad! Or have you forgotten your father” an evil force of presence weighed upon me at that instant. Other shapes moved some placed unthinking hands over unreal ears, others collapsed in the void and some I could feel were laughing with the respondent.

“You are here for repurposing and rebirth back on the solid plane.” The voice bellowed at me. “And any others amongst you that cannot remember your purpose here should regress into your being and find who you really are before you move past the next holding chase.” It finished.

“Who are you” I motioned toward the large phantom as it glided towards me. It had a physical presence of sorts unlike the rest of us, and was distinctly non human in many ways but in others I felt it to be comforting and almost too human.

“You do not recall your favoured blood and leader in subterfuge and sins of the flesh”. It paused for a time. I am the builder of the tower, the instructor of men, the death of many or the one who seeks revenge, against that so called God for drowning a world that was learning to live upon his created plain called earth”. Again there was a pause I looked in the general direction of the towering shadow and as it moved towards me solid and huge with muscle and tusk its newly formed mouth opened and said “I am Nimrod, right hand to the light bringer: your father!”.

Although I had no body or head my essence swirled in the void and as I hit the front of the moving throng, my presence moved swiftly as one yet again to another darker place that was a holding cell or worse. Again what passes for time in this place transpired and I was left to remember my previous lives, and in all I had lived through eighty eight births and deaths each one as simple as the last, deaths young, old and all ages in-between, from natural causes to being ripped apart by sword and mace in battle. I was also a mother and father many times over as the choice was not mine and never would be. I was a slave to the darkness and I could feel that each time I came back I liked it less each time but the nature of my placing on the earthly plane was to cause as much disruption to the fabric of god’s society as possible, from simple seduction of a good spirit to outright murder.

“What am I” I said now out aloud to myself and the darkness peeled back to reveal a red, purple hue to the surroundings.

“You are the servant of my will Azurad and as your father you do it with a measure of hatred and distrust I cannot create myself.” The voice is simple and light but as oppressive as a water laden towel on pressing over your mouth and nose during torture. The pain I felt and cold although I had no body is excruciating. “You are one of my favoured few and your father my right hand, man? No that sounds too much like the world I send you, let’s just say he is the mace in my armoury.” It said.

“Now are you going to stay a while and recover your thoughts, or do you want to go back in line and await your rebirth.”  The words he formed ate through my unfocused self like acid burning a hole in plastic. “No master I would like for to be cast back into the shell I just departed if possible? My life was moving at a rate and I was to enact my plan soon”. I lied.

“I did not see that at all Azurad! I saw a normal life being led nothing to undermine the god state of mind at all or simply create havoc amongst his little toys he calls humans.” Was his painful reply

“No I had plans for action I assure you master, I was luring one so young into a life away from the church and into obscure depravity and drug filled mindlessness.”  Again I lied.

I saw glowing embers where eyes should be and a hollow sound as all went dark as the words “So be it” burned my soul.

Pain so much pain was the only thing I could feel and the taste of burnt copper in my mouth, bones and organs shattered beyond repair screamed and bled internal. A woman’s voice was screaming orders, and she was saying “ring 911 he’s alive” I felt my bones tingle and my organs knit as the flesh and blood I owned regenerated and formed a living organism once more. I moaned and opened one eye and all I could hear before I passed out was the soft female whisper in my ear “What are you?”

Copywrite - Graeme Hawke 2012

MALEVOLENT - Get my Novel now on AMAZON

Link to my WEB STORE

The Horror House





or you can just look for my novelMALEVOLENT

New Web store - DARK TEES

Guys and gals come and see my new web store I am just starting and will be updating designes all the time so come back and have a look frequently

DARK TEES WEB SITE - T shirts and more

Realisation of a murderer - Chapter 7 Teaser

This summary is not available. Please click here to view the post.

Come and see what the fuss is about! ADULTS ONLY PLEASE!

I have another Blog with my poetry and other writings as well as a sight dedicated to my Novella this is too hot for me to put any hints on here so if you like a hot steamy Thriller thats XXX rated come on over and read teh three teaser chapters and something of me.

Graeme Hawke

http://jennydontlosemynumber.blogspot.com.au/2012/07/jenny-dont-lose-my-number-adults-only.html

My Author Spotlight page on LuLu.com - Graeme Hawke

Ok readers you can find out more about me and my published works here and also preview my novels to see if you like them. Be warned "Jenny Don't loose My Number" is  ADULTS ONLY!  and too hot for me to preview here so come on over it will only take a minute of your time and you might like what you read.

http://www.lulu.com/spotlight/Graeme_Hawke

Graeme Hawke

Chapter 6 - The plan - A short update chapter -brutal

 

Chapter 6 – The Plan

Ok driving to the airport what time is it four fifty in the morning, ok parcel was sent last night so the day ahead is meetings and a presentation then back to the hotel and find a victim. It’s balmy this morning, wallet do I have my wallet, yes ok good. I am so excited I don’t know how I am going to do this but hey keep calm that a boy.

Park up, place the ticket in my top pocket, other business men and women on their way, through the scanners, laptop out and belt off no beeping good, nod to the guy at the scanner, smile. “Excuse me sir can you bring your case over here please for testing.” An Indian voice asked politely. Smile “no problems you can check me while I pack up everything.” Stand still let him go over everything.

“You are all clear sir thank you” he says. Ok to the lounge, get some breakfast, check in and my seat is up front because I’m a platinum member, I fly way too much! A pancake that’s what I’ll have. Nice ass on that old duck, she would be a goer. Nod to a guy that’s always in there with me, he travels too much as well. I wonder if he has a hobby on the side like me. Back to my table eat sit and wait.

The flight was ok no problems, head to the rent a car place; have a fag before I get there. I don’t smoke much; travel allows me to without putting up with shit from the wife.

“Mr. Davies nice to see you again your car is in bay C3, now take the keys drive to the office, no drama. Meetings all went well, customer presentation was a hit, and I did well. Wait for five o’clock and go to the hotel, package in my brief case.

Checking in was a dream as usual they know me, up the elevator to my room; “can a book a table for seven tonight please for two people…….yes Davies, thank you” ok alibi is set up now wait.

Ok its six pm, got my jeans on and a pair of dyed black disposable overalls in my bag, a gimp mask I bought with the view of the wife letting me wear it while we had sex, the whole rape thing didn’t ignite her at all what a shame it was, now room key, car keys, wallet, check ok down stairs, use the stairs that way they won’t remember me using the lift with a bag, all good so far, outside now it’s cool and dusk, no real wind but a little nip in the air, just the way I like it, if it’s too hot I don’t care much for it.

Ok concentrate, drive west along Dougherty road, now head for the old sector in West Heidelberg, always nuffs walking along there and it’s a rough neighborhood. There’s a young lad sitting on a fence, no too close to home, pull into a park car park and wait.

Ok get out my heart is racing, in the trees, waiting, all in black I’m hard to make out amongst the shadows.

“Hey mister” Fuck a voice from behind me; shit I’m made, fuck!!!!!

Ok stay calm and smile, that’s it. “You talking to me son” I look at him with a grin like Wallace when he eats cheese.

“You looking for fun mister” he said in a whisper. “Fifty bucks I’ll suck you off right here.” He said again looking at me sniffing.

He’s a junky but he is only about sixteen, what the hell is he doing out here, think, oh well at least this way I don’t have to go looking for one. Wallet, I did around looking for the cash and give him a twenty. “You get the rest when you finish ok.” (That way you won’t run off when I give you the notes.)

“Ok sure I spose” he said as he led me to a clump of bushes and trees, on his knees I undid the overalls and unzipped my fly and my already hard penis hit the cool air awaiting the warmth of his mouth. The knife was a blur I slid it under the bottom of his jaw on the left side and angled the blade up into his brain. It scraped on bone and sinew as it pressed home and I slid it out slowly as he started to slump ready for another strike. He was looking at me his drugged up sight not believing what had happened to him and his blood and vita was all over my right hand making it warm then cold and sticky, copper, a metallic smell hit the air and I knew he was bleeding out. Leaning down I looked him in the eyes and said “Number Three” and his internal lights went out. As I watched I felt a shiver of pure pleasure wash over my body and I realized my penis had slipped back inside my zipper and I was ejaculating in my pants. Fuck me what was that about, move, now, the knife inside the bag I had, walk to the car hide the hand in the removed blood splashed overalls, ok bag, fold and push, stay calm fuck you, ok breath you just killed him, I smiled, my breath was starting to even out, the baby wipes got rid of most of the blood on my hands. Bag it all up, another plastic bag, more ties, and another for good measure. Slide it in the boot from the back seat that way they don’t know your putting something in the boot if they are watching, who’s watching! No-one calm down, nearly out, car in drive moving away, head west still away from the hotel. Shit what am I going to do with the bags of clothes’ and the knife, didn’t think that through too well! I know, ok find a woolies, the shops are shut now and most of them have industrial waste bins. There is a Coles that will do, steady don’t rush it. Park up next to it. Right slip it in and back in the car. The knife under my seat, wiped clean and bleached with white king, not here no way, to close together. Just ditch it on the way home out the car window, won’t find it for days and even if they do there is nothing of me on there not my blood and no prints now. Should be back in about fifteen minutes, walk up and put my trousers and shirt back on.

Hands clean, no real smell about me the quick shower worked well.

“Ah yes my Davies table for two sir” he motioned me forward. “Alas my dinner quest is indisposed so I will be by myself tonight” that’s it look at your watch, he did the same time stamp done.

I think I might treat myself to a steak tonight, life is good.

Copywrite Graeme Hawke 2012

Chapter 5 - New chapter for my new Novel

 

Chapter 5 – Life, Love and Murder

The sun was shining, some beautiful high strata clouds overhead, some Wily Wagtails dancing like two finalists on ‘So you think you can dance’, to some interpretative routine, and the thoughts in my head leading me to stop doing what I had started, How pathetic am I!

The coffee I am drinking is so aromatic it’s almost dream inducing. I love my Cibo coffee and cake on a Sunday morning while watching all the pretty young things walk past in the Mall. This one coming is ok, Oh my god look at the arse on that one.

“Dad can I have another bite of your chocolate cake, Pleeeeese!” Lou asked with her eyes wide and beckoning.

“Of course you can” I said and passed the spoon to her. It always looks better if I am with her as I scout the landscape, coz she is cute and I look less threatening. A blond walked over turned and sat down across from me in a small skirt and top. I love short skirts and I glanced at her thighs with the anticipation of a flash of her panties underneath, ah there ya go pink under denim is always a favorite with me, heart racing, pounding the blood downstairs.

“Dad I want an ice cream, can we get an ice cream after you’re finished?” Lou interrupted my train of thought.

“What, yeah sure baby…..you can have ice cream” I replied back to her as I tried to steal another glimpse of that amazing sight but she had crossed her legs and the opportunity passed.

As usual the coffee was great and the cake good, my leg was playing up a little and I was replaying the radio report from this morning in my head. They didn’t find her until today that’s two days, and it was only because of the smell as someone walked past that they found her. Cops don’t have a clue totally different mo to that of the other murder, so I hope I have them on the run. It doesn’t stop me from hoping I didn’t do something wrong and they know it’s me, no talk of anything but the cops keep stuff back and don’t tell everything. The more I act normal the more I fit in.

The sun on my face is refreshing but there is only so much heat a man can bare, but it does bring out the miniskirts and see through dresses.

“can we go to Toys R Us dad” Lou asked with a hint of I always get my way in her eyes.

“I suppose we can, but only to look, your mother will kill me if you come home with more Leggo!” I replied to her with a fake scowl on my face that turned into a smile.

The rest of the day went easy and I dropped her home and took off again as it was only one pm and the wife was at lunch with the girls from the gym, and Lou will be fine with her new leggo and her big sister to look after her.

I am anxious and I feel it in my stomach, I want to drive past where I left the body but I don’t dare in case someone sees my car and points to me, I know I’ll go to Peep a view in the city. I was playing it out in my head park up walk in, get change and then head for a booth. I listened to the radio on the way their just to see if anything was going on but hey its Adelaide nothing happens. I park up the coolness of my car is forgotten as the heat from outside hits me and I sweat almost instantly on my brow. I walk slowly to the front stairs next to an Italian restaurant, never know its name as my head is always down at this point as to not make eye contact with anyone outside. The walk up is stifling and I can feel the cold air coming down to meet me and I am reinvigorated as I hit the landing. There are a couple of guys in there all not looking at each other and the young guy behind the counter said hello and I ask him for twenty dollars in two dollar coins. He complies and says just give her a minute as she’s in a private show. I look at the DVDs on the wall and walk fast away from the gay section as I walk in, homos! I can’t stand them, but for some reason I want a tranny to suck me off, go figure! Ok walk in a cubicle and close the door behind me, make sure a latch it shut.

Ok get some tissues out of the dispenser, drop my shorts and a drop ten bucks worth in the coin slot that should be enough to get me off. The smell of wasted seamen fills my nostrils and I look down at the waste basket and see a mountain of lost children absorbing into the paper towel.

The window un-frosts and there is a tall red head strutting around looking directly at me as she sits and opens her legs showing her perfectly bald vaginal lips. My breath is starting to labour already and she reaches for a huge black dildo by her side, and she uses it to part her awaiting lips. She bites down on her bottom lip and flicks her hair and then she stands turns and opens her legs toward my window, my hand is almost a blur in my peripheral vision as I watch her slide a smaller device into her ass at the same time. My eyes are closing, knees going weak, tissue in place, I can feel the heat and moisture from the gushing substance as it makes my hand sticky and now the cold is hitting my head as it relaxes and slackens in my hand. I look up and she is satisfied as the window flashes and turns frosted again. Wow that’s better, get it all, wipe it clean and drop it in the waste bin with the rest. I could almost hear the screams of children unborn as I pulled my shorts up and got myself together as I unlatched the door and moved out into the awaiting room full of DVDs and perverts.

Keep walking Charles don’t engage that’s it the stairs are up ahead, good keep going that’s it almost out in the street, head down now walk to the car. “What are you looking at bitch” stupid fat mole stop judging me for having a wank over a chick fucking herself coz my sex life is about as interesting as your face.

Don’t get upset now, you should be happy you just had the release you were looking for. That’s right I am happy now, I was whistling some tune in my head and my mind drifted back to the heat, damn it’s hot in here, turn the air up to arctic blast, that’s it much better now, It’s time to go home, why? Why go home to my dull existence, coz I have to!

Another day over with another night to endure, the kids are going homework and the wife is ironing, bitching the entire time as to why she has to do it, for fuck sake I work all week she does twenty hrs a week and spends the rest of her time at the gym or out to lunch with those skinny wannabe bitches, and she always wants me to be friends with them and their husbands, what a joke, apart from Marcus the rest are a bunch of sterile and ineffectual wankers, Kate his wife is lovely and enjoys the sauce, tall blond and always friendly, I don’t know why but I can’t bring myself to thinking of her in that way, maybe it’s because she is nice. I am watching Sues ass move side to side as she irons in her underpants and a tank top because it’s hot. I still love that phat ass of hers its why I fell for her in the first place, wasn’t the blowjobs that’s for sure. I laughed aloud not meaning to. “What’s so funny” she turned and said as I chuckled, oh don’t tell her she’ll go off, “I was watching your ass move and thinking about giving it a smack like I used to” I said in reply. “Well if you’re a good boy I might let you later” she said back at me. What am I a dog now, if you’re a good boy “GO FUCK YOURSELF BITCH”.

“Oh look who’s horny” I said instead, and she smiled back at me. Oh yay a dead fuck again tonight, that’s if I’m lucky because she normally says this shit and then says she’s tired. We’ll see.

The news is on soon, “can I turn the TV over honey” I cooed. Oh good she’s handing me the remote. Chanel nine news, that’s the one for me, they are the best by far. Ok sit down and act calm Charles.

“The body found off of hackney road at Northfield was that of local woman Lindsay Lewis, the nineteen your old went missing three days ago and was found by a local woman who was walking her dog. Police have yet to release a cause of death, but did indicate the attack was of a sexual nature…… in other news”

Oh so they are not going to release it all, keep it back in case someone is caught and says to much that wasn’t leaked to the press. “That’s terrible and it was only around the corner too” sue piped in with. “it was miles away and babe you don’t go walking in the morning so your safe” (smiling but laughing inside) “And what does that mean?” she came at me. “Nothing darling I am merely stating a fact; (no one wants an old bitch like you anyway) that’s all” I said back, I should add in its because your such a dead root I go looking for them, but hey, now is not the time.

It’s strange I know now as I am laying here in bed waiting for my wife to finish her ritualistic cleaning of the pussy, brushing her teeth and putting on sexy underwear that makes her feel twenty years younger, but see through nylon is not a magical material. Shhhh the doors opening, my hand is instinctively on my meat.

Damn she actually looks ok; maybe this will be ok for a change.

The next few days were uneventful and I won’t bore you with the details needless to say I had the urge to kill again, but not like you see in the movies or these sensational dramas, I am a serial Killer! I understand now, it’s not the voices in my head, it’s what I want to do, it’s not the sex, I don’t think it is anyway, it’s the thought of holding someone as they expire, it’s just intoxicating, powerful, almost god like if I believed in a god that is. All know is I can’t remember shit from before I was born and I am not going to know shit after I’m dead. Right so now I need to kill a male, not a woman, and no sex involved, and a knife this time, random, from behind, what knife can I use, shit I don’t have one and I don’t want to keep it after. I’ll have to steal one from somewhere, I can’t risk a shop, a restaurant, that’s it I’ll take the family to the Oriental for dinner and steal a knife and sharpen it up and tape the handle to get extra leverage. This is exciting, I might just do some work now I have it planned.

Dial, Sue, mobile, “Hello what do you want, you never call me unless it’s an emergency”

“Well I was thinking and I want to take you and the girls out to dinner at that place on main northeast road….yep that’s the one….do I have to have a reason, I love you isn’t that good enough…..good ok be ready I have reservations at six thirty……..that’s ok I’ll be home in time to change don’t worry, ok bye” ok that’s done I have a knife on the way and now where that’s me next problem, oh shit I’m baring up again, it’s the killing I am sure of it that makes me Horney not me being Horney that causes me to kill. Ok think where, can’t be close by has to be away from here, what about on my trip to Melbourne on Thursday, yes its only Tuesday I have two days get the knife send it by courier to the Melbourne office addressed to me and that way I’m covered with getting through the airport, and I can take out someone at night while I am supposed to be in a hotel.

I need to masturbate!

Chapter 4 - Getting away with Murder

 

Chapter 4 – Getting away with murder

“A body was found just after eight pm tonight in a shallow ditch, one kilometer south of Outer harbor, the body is being taken to Adelaide forensics building to hopefully identify the victim.”

“On a lighter note the handbag affair that has local offi……….”

Turn that down, so they don’t know who did what, but they wouldn’t say yet anyway, the cops would have it all under wraps until they work the scene and look for any evidence. Shit! I didn’t try and hide the tread marks on the tires! Oh well I need new ones anyway, I’ll do it later though not just yet if I act to early they might trace the tire back to a car make and find me. (No they won’t, they have no motive and no suspect) that’s right I’m not a criminal I don’t exist on any data bases anywhere.  

“You coming to bed babe.” My wife asked my quietly from behind.

“na I think I’ll just sit and finish watching the news first hun” I replied back to her, but I won’t be watching the TV for long. Door closed, right start up the computer, check emails, nothing, face book, a few likes and shit but as usual it’s a load of crap. Anyone who can tell me otherwise is a demented teenager, Face book is crap and just a way for people to stay out of arms reach coz you’re never anonymous on the net!

Ok Porn, Xvids yes full a facial teen, that’s more like it. Hello daddy, the little fella is ready and willing, and the open air feels good around my shaft. Slowly don’t be in a rush now, but fuck she is cute, take it bitch, oh yes that’s it, concentrate Charlie, don’t unload yet, but she is so hot, oh that’s a girl take it all, make her gag on it, OH fuck yes that’s it take it all over your face baby.

Always a mess, but always a release.

Ok turn it off and get ready for bed big day tomorrow, I might start a new novel about a serial killer who is just an average Joe. That’s it my writers block has left the building, I will start tomorrow, and maybe I can use my escapade from tonight as a start point. (Yawn!) oh well there is always more where she came from.

Eyes opening, the face of that young girl she’s looking up at me, got my meat in her mouth. That’s it baby take it all. My cock is getting hot, what’s going on, her face is melting the heat, my cock is on fire, I scream!

Jolted awake I am trembling and sweating.

“Are you ok love” Susan asks as she pats my arm.

“Yep all good love” I whisper back to her.

Damn that was weird, I have never had such an intense feeling in my dreams before, and this is new. Guilt I wonder, conscience maybe? I don’t know which but if I can relive the murders in my mind like this, who needs porn, my knob is the size of a babies forearm, and tight like its fit to burst.

Back to sleep with you Charles you’re up early for the gym remember, that’s it drift off and remember.

“BEEP,BEEP,BEEP” slap

That stopped it. Five thirty am up and dressed. Drive to the gym, and get on that treadmill you fat bastard. On the drive I remember what happened the night previous. A smile blooms over my face. It was so easy, so damn easy, I bet I could do one in the morning as well if I plan it right, have to be random though, no plan or pattern or they will trace me. No sex either no chance of DNA to catch me with, just the thrill of power. A young girl was in the gym already, no not her to obvious, needs to be away from here and quick so I can get to here and have an alibi between home and here. Age sex does it matter, yes it matters the young ones are so cute. They run and walk early all the time. Tomorrow? Maybe? We’ll see, keep walking fatty.

Drive back is so good wet and cool in the summer morning, a bit stinky, need a bath, drive home quiet, park up and go inside no-one up yet. Tiptoe in the bathroom, turn the water on and slide in the tub, the warm water washes away everything. The door opens its Susan in her nighty, she sits takes a piss and removes the flimsy material as she walks to the shower. I grab her and pull her close to the bath edge. “C’mon babe jump in with daddy”

“Leave me alone you idiot, I gotta get ready for work and your all smelly, and you are not my daddy” she snapped back at me as she pushed my advances away.

“Fuck you then” I said aloud.

“What so it’s my problem I don’t want to jump in the bath with you so you can stick that thing in me and satisfy yourself, bla bla bla bla bla.” I switched off as usual and just said, “Whatever you stuck up bitch”

She showered and got out while I made her watch me masturbate in the warm bath, calling out other women’s names, as I came.

“Feel better now you psycho” she said

“As a matter of fact I do you cold hearted bitch! God forbid you get horny at all and if it’s not on your back in bed with a fucking mask on your eyes we don’t do anything, GOD forbid you ever suck me off what’s it been twelve years!” I spat at her.

She started to cry and ran out of the bathroom, I wanted to show remorse for what I had said but I just couldn’t, I wanted to bash her face in truth be told.

I drained the soapy water and dried off, dressed and left for work as soon as I could, I kissed a sleepy Lou on the head and yelled up to the other one still getting dressed. I stole a glance at Susan and my lip curled and I went to the car and drove to work.  Stupid bitch! Who does she think she is if she doesn’t like it then she can piss off? I earn all the cash anyway her measly pittance wouldn’t keep her in gym clothes and shoes for a week. Now I’m annoyed I need to subdue my senses for a while, radio that will do it, inane comedic morning radio. Humming some old eighties tune in my head, that finishes.

“This is the seven o’clock news. Police are investigating a murder last night when the body of what we know now was a young woman was found burning in a shallow ditch north of Adelaide, there are no details at this point and police are not saying what the cause of death is……..More on the driver who ran a red lig…..” Ignoring the rest I drifted back to the comments and the fact that I knew it was me almost made me smile.

The day went off without a hitch, phone calls meetings, people I would rather kill than listen too, maybe I might do one of them at work, that could be interesting but too close to home, that would be like doing the missus, they would look at me first, they always do. No random need to keep it random.

Driving home just had a fag I managed to talk out of Paul, nice guy one of the originals, him I wouldn’t kill. Better not let her catch me with smoke on my breath, ok gum in the console, two sticks, that’s better. Sing along home.

The evening passed without a hitch its now five fifteen, I have my gym bag and a small rope I found in the garage in my bag, its about a meter long with short fibers sticking out of it and it’s a three ply from what I could tell last night. I knotted it about three inches apart in the centre to dig in the esophagus when I tighten it, and I have a half inch dowel tied about eight inches around from the knot to use as a fulcrum to twist tighter.

Ok take off the house is quiet, go left not right and don’t do anything stupid, my mind is racing, my palm sweaty, and my cock is bulging in my shorts. The weather is balmey so they should be in lightweight clothes. I drive for a couple of minutes and pass a woman to the left, too old; you could see the cellulite in her thighs through her tights, Yuk. A little further on a little brunette, jogging with headphones, I drive past not glancing sideways, up ahead is a new housing development and that black covering on the fence so you can’t see behind it. This is it, drive around to the right, my heart is racing, stop, turn it off and get out, my hoodie up and the rope concealed in my gloved hands. There is a gap in the fence and the black covering makes it almost a perfect spot. A car the other way, ducking now to keep out of sight, lucky she has the iPod going can’t hear a thing. She jogs past, now, its gotta be now! I slide out and grab her by the mouth and upper chest, she fights but I’m too big too strong, I drag her back behind the blackness and in the dark I can see the fight in her eyes the determination she will fight me off. I move behind her and place a knee in the small of her back keeping her off balance and my hand on her mouth. Her neck is almost at full extension, she fights but the lack of oxygen is slowing her down. I reach back and place a tennis ball in her mouth and the rope around her neck, my adrenaline was pumping my left hand was fondling her all over under her top in her shorts and finding every hole with my deft fingers. I had her out cold still a pulse though, good I had a condom in my pocket ready and as she falls I pull her shorts down exposing her expertly trimmed and waxed vagina, as I slide in she starts to breath heavy so I place my left hand on her throat and with all my weight push down her eyes popped open and she saw my face in the throes of my final slide inside and out her body, fear looked up at me as she pleaded with her eyes but as I exploded in her warmth she stopped breathing and her eyes rolled back into her head. A shudder came over me and the thrill of the act meant I was a happy camper but I also felt cheated that it was over; I had to get sorted and leave before the sun came up and she would be discovered. I left the rope behind and the condom on my penis pulled up my pants and got into the car. Drive slowly, no lights not yet, I move into a side street and flick on my lights and take the back roads around to my gym the other direction. The condom was falling off my withered member so I grabbed it and tied it off and left it under the front seat. Ok go inside say hello to everyone.

“Morning Bruce, how are ya mate” I said to an aging man in his fifties. Morning Charlie early isn’t it mate?” he replied. “No it’s only five forty” I said back smiling and denoting the time so it was stamped in his subconscious if he was ever asked. As far as my wife was concerned this morning I awoke at five thirty as usual because I put the clock forward in the bedroom as well.

I worked out for an hour and then went home for a bath as usual and dropped the condom out the window on the way home, it would be road kill in a hour anyway as cars drive over it so that was ok. My bath was hot and uneventful and I didn’t even react when Susan came in naked for her shower. “What not going to try and rape me again this morning” she said with a scowl on her face. I just looked at her and said. “No need, I got all I needed at the gym this morning” as I smiled she frowned but let it go.

Copywrite - Graeme Hawke 2012 All rights reserved
Plagerism is against the law and will be punished

The Knowing of Self - Chapter 3

Chapter 3 – The Knowing of self

Shit I killed her, she made me! No I made me! Damn this is what I wanted all along now I have my toy. Damn I better move quickly though her body is starting to leak the fluids of her life from every orifice.  Shit I have nothing to use.

(Panic is setting in, breathing getting fast and erratic, slow down son don’t lose it now not after all these years, this is what we have been working for)

Ok the drive to North Haven is only a short drive from here; I’m in the back streets of Mansfield Park just behind the football oval. I drive my foot is shaking and the car is starting to stink up a tad of dead girl. Shit I came in her mouth before I strangled her, my DNA is all over her. I can’t keep this one; she has me all over her maybe even hair and skin plus seamen all in her mouth. Those little bastards stay alive for hours and are probably having a field day with the fluid in her throat.

Ok a white cliff, that’s where I need to go its still light! Gotta ring the wife before she gets suspicious, where is my phone.

“Hey babe……Yeah I am working late tonight on that tender should be back by no later than eight ok?”  “Ok, I’ll get some milk from the servo on the way home………..Love you too”

Ok that’s done.

(Damn she was sexy; I might just have a play with her while I drive)

Radio on let’s get some music here; I can’t believe I killed her, did I kill her, yep she’s dead. Wow I feel electric, iPod that’s what I need some Slipknot or Manson. Ok, Manson it is the new CD, awesome stuff.

(What are you looking at dipshit, never seen a guy sing to himself in a car with a dead chick before)

He can’t see her anyway she all slumped down in the foot well of the passenger side just like a bag of shit. Speaking of shit damn she is getting smelly.

(How do I get that smell of death out of the car? Clean it, yes there is a car wash up the road from where I’m gonna dump her.)

Darkness is staring to settle in now, good ok pull off here and drive to the end then turn right, “I’m running from the bloodless for all of my crimes, Shun the light, shun the light” I love this song.

Almost there now don’t panic son keep it together, remember what the old man told you breathe in through the nose out the mouth in steady breaths. That’s how you maximize your oxygen intake, she’s not, (ha, ha) I made myself laugh. Now I gotta get her up so I can lift her out of the passenger seat, shit this is what they mean by dead weight, fuck she’s only fifty kilos but it feels like a tone.

(Noise, outside, what was that – I’m getting paranoid)

Nothing there dickhead, ok out the car move we gotta get her out and dumped before someone comes. Ok under the arms, Oh Yuk what’s that bile dripping down her chin, oh god that’s disgusting. Right get her clothes of, trainers first, socks, undo her jeans and pull them down, oh pink panties.

(Do I want to one last time?)

I undressed her and wiped all the excess fluids away with some toilet paper I always keep in the car a habit my father got me into.

As I entered the lifeless orifice I laughed and thought of my wife this is pretty much our sex life minus the raging hard on I have now. I ended her life and she is no more, I did that, and I emptied the contents of my balls in her dead muff.

(Shit lost control, gotta get on with the task at hand dickhead)

Petrol I need petrol, the five litre can in the back for emergencies will do just fine. Make a pile with her clothes and douse it good, Now I need a depression so the body will burn, piece of timber in the boot, I’ll drag that and make a shallow depression and put her in m hey I know, dry grass and twigs lots of twigs, This is hot work, I might just lose some weight if I keep this up. Ok that’s enough kindling, now the timber on top, douse it good.

(Shit what am I doing?)

Ok place her on top, where is that funnel I had, that’s better now pour some down her throat and fill her stomach and lungs, fill her pussy and ass as well so it will go up and destroy all DNA I may have left behind.

(Use the fishing knife you have in the back)

That’s it I’ll make an incision in the stomach and fill her up as well.

Damn I stink of petrol how am I going to explain that.

(Easy fill the car up on the way home and tell her you spilled some as you overfilled it)

That’s it, easy she will believe that, this is so much fun.

Ok now a match, my kingdom for a match. I’m hungry maybe I’ll pick up same maccas on the way home and a Sundae for the girls.

Whoosh, up ya go darling, and thanks for the fun.

Car, drive gotta get out of here before they send someone to investigate. Take the back streets, no stick to the main roads they will be searching the back streets once this hits.

(What I didn’t see was the body burning, the body of the lifeless girl explodes in flames fueled by the petrol I had filled her with, flames exploded from every orifice and it wasn’t long before she was starting to disintegrate with the generated heat. Such a lovely little thing she was.)

 Fill the car up and stay calm, pull into the shell and act normal, pop the tank and fill it with unleaded, forty two thousand three hundred and twenty seven kilometers was on the odometer that I would have to remember, over and over I reap it to myself.

Click

Full ok now spill some on purpose so the attendant can see you clean it up.

“Oh shit” that’s it make a scene “damn all over my trousers and shoes”. They are all watching good.

“you ok buddy” a young P plate driver asks me.

“Yep but I’m gonna stink now, the wife is going to be upset with me” I laugh with him and walk in the servo to pay using my petrol card. I remembered the odometer as well.

“Sweetheart, yes I know its seven twenty love……………aha, yep….hay you will need to soak my clothes when I get home I had a spill with the petrol as I was filling up……….yep socks as well………of course, oh do the girls want a sundae? I am stopping at maccas……………………ok two chocolate fudge, see ya soon babe…..yea I love you too.”

Phew that’s that now just to get the stuff on the way home and take a shower.

It’s a balmy night thank Christ I can leave the windows down, I need to wipe the seats too I forgot, hand towels, baby wipes, late night woolies is open until nine pm, it’s on the way. The radio is on “I’m a cowboy, on a steel horse I ride, I’m wanted……wannnteedd dead or alive” I love this song; don’t care much for Bonjovi but this song is a classic.

Ok park pop in and straight out, mmm doughnuts one ninety-nine for ten, ok for later when I’m watching the walking dead I taped. Pay now leave, let’s move next stop maccas,  I wonder if shes all gone or if they found her yet, it’s only been twenty minutes.

Sirens in the distance maybe they found her, late news will tell me.

“Welcome to McDonalds how can I help you” the fresh voice said from a speaker as I pulled up.

“I’ll have a Big Mac with cheese large size, diet coke and four chocolate hot fudge sundaes please” I finished

“Drive to the first window that will be twenty one fifty thanks” she finished

Driving up pay cash not receipt transaction that way.

“Fifty cents change, drive to the next window please” the spotty fifteen year old said to me.

The items were passed to me and I placed them on the back seat.

Now for the drive home, and clean the seat as I drive. It’s not that bad and the car smells like babies bum instead of dead teen which is a bonus.

I am starving, I’ll eat some fries on the way. Phone ringing.

“hello mate haw are you? ……….good………..nup just heading home now………..the weekend, no problem……..coffee Saturday after the gym……….same place, cool ok buddy see you then.”

He is such a nice guy a tad geeky but he is a fab friend is Simon.

Punch the garage door key and up she goes, glide in and shut off the engine, mmm how to get all the stuff inside now. The door opened from the house to the garage, “Lou how are you baby” I said.

She eyed me up and saw the chocolate sundaes and said. “I love you dad, can I carry them please.”

“I suppose but be very careful there is one each and if you want you can have a couple of my fries” I finished as I handed her the tray with the gooey goodness and I slipped some fries in her open awaiting mouth like a father Magpie feeding his young.

“Fanks Jad” she said as she led the way inside the house.

I kissed Susan my wife. “Damn you stink get those clothes off this minute.” She said as she took my brief case and burger bag from me. Getting undressed I had an air of normality hit me for the first time in a couple of hours, the previous three hours were so surreal to me as if I watched a movie of me killing and fucking a corpse, then burning the evidence away. Gotta love five years of watching the CI channel to give me all the information I need to not get caught.

I slipped into a top and some shorts and went back to the kitchen and sat eating my burger, watching my family devour the ice treats.

“Busy day love” Susan said smiling.

I looked at her thinking, she knows something, but the puzzled look on her face told me otherwise. I smiled and a mouthful of half chewed burger spilled out into view which made Lou laugh out aloud. “oh dad Yuk” she said.

Life is good!

Copywrite - Graeme Hawke 2012 all rights reserved

Raelization Of a Murderer - Chapter 2

Chapter 2 – The middle years

Let’s just say that my marriage was a great platform for the rest of my time from here on in. I was divorced some years later and it was at this time I hit my darkest days. Suicide was on the table for a period because I could not console myself against the things I did to create a feeling of love lost in my relationship. I knew deep down I was a big part of why the marriage failed, but never the less I felt deep heart ache. I had thoughts that transcended humanity and apart from work I spent my time smoking and drinking myself to an early grave until one night I had a dream that turned my life around.

The dream was me floating in a tank suspended in fluid with drains and pipes attached to me a device on my face that was breathing for me. I felt useless, utterly un-empowered and a husk of a man, that could not even breath for himself. I awoke a different man, I shaved ate, dressed for work and bounded in to my workplace a different man from the one that existed for the previous six years. I was confident and assured of myself and I was coming to terms with who I was as a person. My demeanor on the outside was charming and I reverted to my manipulating best. I became the best I could at everything I touched but with an air of aloofness that saw me the man in charge but still one of the team. I used this knowledge and inbuilt attribute at night as I frequented the Adelaide casino. A tall empowered but vulnerable twenty seven year old man with a baby face and a dark glint in his eye. I befriended many and knew none; I was a quick study in the way of people and used my time here to hone my techniques. Money was tight but not elusive and to a player of people I was a master of the lonely wife or aging single woman. I sat at the roulette table with my customary one hundred dollars in chips and lost most of them in a ten minute bad luck streak. I huffed and went to move on when a tall leggy brunette, well dressed and in her mid forties passed me a stack of her chips, looking straight in my eyes she said “here babe play with these and if you win, keep the winnings all I want is my investment back.”  I nodded and held my hand out to her, “Charles is my name and I am more than flattered but I can’t accept your offer” I held the line of dialogue open waiting for her to finish my sentence which she did with “Stephanie, my name is Stephanie, you my dear boy can call me Steph if it pleases you, and this is not a request it’s an order!” My heart missed a beat she was amazing, beautiful and confident beyond belief. To cut a long story short I used Stephs’ money and made myself a full three thousand dollars profit from using her money. Needless to say I left her house at six am for work in the same clothes after an amazing night together. I let her feel as though she played me but I got everything I planned for that night and continued to do so with varying women for the next three months. I would play with their money win pocket the difference and then please them in such a way as they would then pimp me out to their girlfriends, sometimes I would have two together which was fun.

I had to stop this after the three months as I was becoming that which I did not want, I was visible and not the ghost I started out being. I started a relationship and needed to consolidate myself as a family man, and at the same time was offered a position with work in the United Kingdom.

Marriage and a move later, I am a thirty something in a new country with a whole set of new people to learn about. Sex over there was as easy as being an Aussie in the UK. All I had to do to get laid was speak, and I could not keep up with myself as I tallied up my conquests. They were all inadequate and not worth much except a place to enjoy the bodies and flesh of some beautiful English roses. I also found out they loved my fetish and some would parade in their panties for me before sex, or keep them on for me during sex, gotta love the English girls. Then one day it all changed, my wife was pregnant and I was going to be  a father so I needed to buckle down and disappear again back into an invisible life of the normal.

The next few years were so compliant from me it wasn’t funny, I was a dad and a husband of such equal measure no-one could have guessed my inner thoughts at night and on the new thing called the internet, on chat rooms like ICQ was quietly feeding my burning inner addiction for power and sex. I had three slaves who would do anything I asked and they would take pictures and post them back to me showing all sorts of depraved acts. One had a beer bottle in her ass while she was using a dildo, and another sent me pics of herself being abused analy by some guy, while handcuffed to a frame. As I say it’s not the sex that was enticing but the power I held over them to do my bidding.

This kept up for a further two years before I met up with Jenny.

I had met her through ICQ and she was a beautiful African American girl of twenty one who was studying in Cambridge for three months as part of her studies. I met her in a hotel just outside of Cambridge and her special fetish had me intrigued, she loved to reach orgasm at the same time as she was being gently strangled. I found this totally stimulating we had all the upfront foreplay and she started with the “do me now” speak so I moved behind her and using a scarf gently pulled it tight as I was fucking her, she went mad and I could feel her getting worked up more and more telling me, “Tighter, tighter” so I did just a little and I could hear her struggling for air but she told me more so I di and just as her pussy tightened and she came she collapsed on the bed, passed out, or dead I did not know. I reached around looking for a pulse and sure enough her heart was still beating fast, I noticed my cock was rock hard with the excitement and I entered the now unmoving body and used every hole I could, her vagina, ass and mouth, I didn’t last long and before you could say bingo I let a huge wad of seamen loose in her warm yet un flinching vagina. She came around moments later and noticed I had cum in her and she smiled and said, “Get off on that did we baby”. I looked at her and said “yes I did but not until you were out to it sorry, I didn’t think you would pass out!” and with that she got all upset and started to put her clothes on. I looked at her puzzled, “what did I do wrong” I asked with genuine unknowing. “You fucked me when I was out of it you sick fucker! That’s what’s wrong.” She yelled at me. “I don’t get it, I screw you and strangle you, and that’s ok! but if I finish after you pass out then I’m the sick one?” I yelled back. She looked at me and said “I have a fetish, not a need to be a fuck toy for a necrophiliac!” and she stormed out of the room and slammed the door.

I sat unknowing and thought about what she said, and yes it wasn’t the sex or the feeling of her warmth around my cock that did the job, but the fact that I could use her for whatever purpose I wanted. My dream from when I was ten years old flooded my mind and I smiled a ten year old smile filled with wonderment and naughtiness. “Now that’s what I like” I said aloud to myself and I looked in the mirror on the wall. Looking back at me for the first time in over thirty five years was a man who knew what he liked and it took a twenty five year old memory of a dream and a stupid bitch to realize it.

I had found my love in life and there was no way my loving wife would play dead for me even though our sex since the birth of my daughter Jessica has pretty much been roll on roll off. I wondered and then shook my head no! I needed her, I loved her but she could never give me all I required that was now plainly obvious to me.

My return to Australia and six years behind me in the UK had opened my eyes to so much about me and my life. I was now for the first time actively looking for submissives so I could live out my fantasies. My job saw me travel extensively to both Melbourne and Sydney with overnight stays so I sought out a network of women that I could have power over and do what I liked. In the mean time I had another daughter Louise and a sex life at home that was so rudimentary that it was border line hardly worth it at all. All of this brings my up to now and yes ten years on from there I have a great job a thriving family a unique fetish with willing participants and now at forty eight I find myself with an amazingly dead blonde young corpse in my lap and a raging hard on!

Copywrite Graeme Hawke 2012 - All right reserved

All writings owned and published by Graeme Hawke are owned by author - Plagiarism will be prosecuted